“We talk to one another about
the help we both need. We admonish one another to go the way Christ bids us to
go. We warn one another against the disobedience that is our undoing. We are
gentle and firm with one another, for we know both God’s kindness and God’s
firmness.” Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Life
Together, Fortress Press, 2015 (Reader’s Edition), page 82.
Bonhoeffer thinks it
“inconceivable” that Christians not speak God’s Word and will to one another.
This is, of course, the New Testament picture of the Body of Christ;
encouraging one another, building up one another, correcting one another,
weeping with one another, rejoicing with one another. We all have blind spots,
none of us enjoy total vision and perspective, and we all have something to
offer others. Sadly, we tend to see two extremes in the church; one extreme
says nothing, the other extreme arrogantly spouts Scripture and “thus says the
Lord” to the point of domination, manipulation, and cheapening the Bible – for
the Bible becomes not a Word from God but a document forced into the service of
man. Paul writes that we are to submit to one another in the fear of Christ; we
ought to be conscious of the fear of God when we listen to the Word from a
brother, and we most certainly ought to be conscious of the fear of God when we
speak the Word to a brother. We ought not to listen apart from submission, and
we ought not to speak apart from submission.
People who are quick to speak
the Word to others are often people who have not first provided the service of
listening and practical help. Those who never speak are often those who do not
know the Word, or who do not want to take the risk of rejection and
misunderstanding. Those who never speak often defer to social norms; social
norms should never be the norms of life
together; we are called not to be conformed to the world but to be
transformed by the Word and the Holy Spirit. Do I love my brother enough to
speak to him? Do I love my brother enough to listen to him?
Pride is an enemy of those who
speak, of those who don’t speak, and of those who listen. Those who listen may
pridefully reject the Word spoken to them. They may do this because they deny
there is anything wrong with them, and they may also do it because of the
vessel through whom the Word comes. It may be one thing for a well-respected
brother to counsel us, but how do we react when a brother of low-esteem and
humble means speaks to us? It is one thing for someone with whom we are
comfortable speaks to us, but how do we react to a brother with whom we have
nothing in common?
Pride is an enemy of those who
speak for they can mistake themselves for the Word of God in the sense of
thinking themselves to be something they are not. We know nothing worth knowing
in and of ourselves, everything comes to us through the grace of our Lord Jesus
Christ. If we have something to share with a brother, if that something is from
God then it does not belong to us…we are but stewards. We are to share only
what we have been given and no more, and we are to be careful with what we
share lest we inject our own speculation. As Peter writes, we are to speak as
the oracles of God, but we are not the oracles, it is God’s Word not ours. It
is better to speak a little and stop, not going beyond what we know to be the
Word. If we stop and are quiet and then have clarifying thoughts, we can speak
again – but too much talking often takes us beyond the Word, diluting it,
overlaying it with our “wisdom” and “common sense” and speculation. We can take
others out on a limb of a tree that they were never meant to be. We do not want
to create or foster dependence on us, but on Christ and His Word.
At this point I want to gently
make an observation; there are those always seeking “a Word from God”, it is
better to seek the Word of God rather than a Word from God. The Word of God
will sustain us every moment of our lives, whereas seeking “a Word from God”
(in the sense I use the term) creates not a life of relationship with Christ
and others, not a life of the Word living and growing within us, but rather a
mentality of neediness and immaturity and dependence on others. Interdependence
in life together is Biblical,
dependence on others for constant direction is unhealthy for the church. Preachers and teachers who foster
dependence in others have departed from Biblical eldership and teaching – and
this can take many forms.
Pride is also an enemy of
those who do not speak the Word of God to brothers. They may be retreating
within the walls of social norms, “We don’t do that around here. Religion is a
private matter” (even in church!) They may be uncomfortable, which is generally
good. They may be concerned of what others may think – “He is taking things too
seriously!” They may not want to expose themselves and thus be vulnerable (who
does?) Do we love others to the point of deciding not to protect ourselves?
Agape does not protect itself, its nature is sacrificial; it does not protect
but rather offers itself. If we feel like we are dying when we share the Word of
God with others that is fine, for we are called to the Way of the Cross – dying
may not feel like a good thing but it is a good thing.
As Bonhoeffer mentions,
sometimes the words spoken to us are “inept and awkward” – but those words can
still be the Word of God. Too often our focus is on the messenger or the medium
through which the message is delivered, as C.S. Lewis wrote, there were three
images he was always fighting against; his image of God, his image of others,
and his image of himself. In other words, our perceptions are not always
accurate and they can lead us to false conclusions and ways of living.
(Consider Lewis’s The Pilgrim’s Regress
and Till We Have Faces for examples
of how he dealt with this – one written at the beginning of his Christian life
and one toward the end of his journey).
I recall words a brother once
spoke to me about myself that were true, but I couldn’t hear them at the time
because at the time he and I had a deep conflict between us (we had once been
quite close). He could have spoken them more gently and more considerately, but
the fact remains that what he spoke was true but I didn’t hear it because I was
focused on who was saying it and how he was saying it and not on what was being
said. Alas, we remain human…it will be liberating when this tent is put off and
we are clothed with eternal garments.
Who are we speaking the Word
of God to? Who is speaking the Word of God to us?
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