We have asked three questions regarding the love of John 15:12 – 17: What does this look like in the church? What does this look like in my own life? What does this look like in my family?
We’ve pondered the second question, now let’s consider the third. There are two elements to the question of what loving one another as Jesus loves us looks like in our families. The first is obvious, the second may not be.
Do we, within our families, love one another as Jesus loves us? Do we practice laying our lives down for one another? At the same time, we should ask whether our families, as family units, are laying their lives down for others outside their families.
What I mean is that just as individuals are called to love others as Jesus sacrificially loves them, so families are called to love others as Jesus sacrificially loves them (and of course the same is true of congregations and denominations and other associations in Christ). Self-centeredness within families and congregations is idolatrous just as self-centeredness in individuals is idolatrous. The Nature of God is loving and self-giving, therefore if the Nature of God abides within us and in our relationships in Christ, then those relationships ought to display the self-giving and sacrificial love of God, the love that lays down its life for its friends.
This can be a difficult thing to wrestle with in our self-centered culture, for we have been taught, within and without the professing church, to rationalize our selfishness. We have erected our own images of spiritual health and success in place of the Lamb of God. We have substituted our own images of righteousness for the righteousness of Jesus Christ. There have been many things God has given us for our good that we turned into bronze serpents.
Rather than on mission to share Jesus Christ with the world, our mission has become our own self-improvement, our own blessing, and perpetuating our own kingdoms. Our center of gravity is us as individuals, is us as families, and is us as congregations (and denominations and movements).
This, my friends, is opposed to our text (John 15:12 – 17), it is opposed to the Upper Room, the Gospel of John, the life of Jesus Christ, and to the Message and Call of Scripture.
The Good News is that because our heavenly Father knows each of us, and because He loves us so deeply, He will guide us out of our individual and collective self-centeredness if we will ask Him for help. And let’s remember, it must always begin by looking in the mirror – it must begin with me, always with me. I must never look at another person, whether it be my wife, other family members, friends, brothers and sisters in Christ, and think, “If only that person would change!”
O my how we lie to ourselves! My love for Christ and others, and my obedience to Jesus Christ, is at the core of the Royal Inclusio. I am called to lay my life down for others, I am not called to manipulate others to lay their lives down for me.
Let’s make no mistake that we are talking about the Cross of Jesus Christ working itself out in our lives – and the Cross means crucifixion. We must not spare ourselves, our families, or our congregations from the Cross – not if we truly love them. We must not be like Peter when he attempted to shield Jesus from the Cross (Matthew 16:21–23). Do we realize this? O pastors, you are doing your congregations no favors when you shield them from the Cross of Christ. We are called to participate with Jesus Christ in His crucifixion (Galatians 2:20; 6:14; 2 Corinthians 4:11–12; Romans Chapter 6).
When the Cross of Christ and the Christ of the Cross ceases to be our center of gravity, and is displaced by self-centeredness, including familial, congregational, institutional, and political and nationalistic self-centeredness, we have made our own golden calves.
Radical? Why of course it is radical. It is radical because the love of Jesus Christ is radical. This is the Love that is our calling into eternity…and if we are not living for eternity then we are a foolish people. Are we ashamed to live for eternity? Are we ashamed to live for Jesus?
Are we not a collective expression of the Rich Young Ruler? Unwilling to give what we cannot keep to gain what we cannot lose?
If we are not teaching our families this love by the way we live, why not? If our families are not teaching others this love by the way they live, why not? If our churches and denominations and movements are not displaying the sacrificial love of Jesus Christ, why not?
Jesus will teach us His Way of Life, His Way of Love, His Way of giving. We can trust Him to teach us today, tomorrow, and into eternity. He calls us into the deep koinonia of the Trinity, a koinonia of sacrificial love and kindness and grace and joy. We cannot do this in and of ourselves, but as we abide in the Vine, O yes, as we abide in the Vine, He will teach us to lay down our lives for others as He laid down His life for us.
There is no greater love than this!
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